How to Make Friends with the Dark (2019) Parents Guide: Is the book OK for kids?

Sexual content is limited to the periphery of the narrative, focusing more on the emotional weight of teenage relationships than physical acts. Tiger reflects on her past intimacy with Kai, mentioning their 'first time' in a way that emphasizes her current feeling of isolation rather than providing graphic detail. There are scenes involving kissing and physical closeness between Tiger and Kai, but these are brief and secondary to her grief. Some dialogue among other teenagers includes crude references to bodies or…

Violence is depicted both as external physical conflict and internal self-destruction. The most harrowing descriptions involve Tiger viewing her mother's body in the morgue and the clinical reality of death, such as post-mortem bruising. Tiger engages in self-harm, specifically cutting her arm with a jagged piece of plastic to cope with her overwhelming emotional numbness, which is described with significant detail. Physical altercations occur between foster children, including a notable fight involving scratching…

The novel utilizes strong language frequently to depict the raw, unfiltered anger of a grieving teenager. Profanity including 'f*ck,' 'sh*t,' 'bitch,' 'ass,' and 'hell' is integrated into both the dialogue and Tiger's first-person internal monologue. The frequency of these terms increases during scenes of high stress, such as when Tiger is navigating the bureaucracy of Child Protective Services or clashing with other girls in group homes. The language serves to ground the story in a gritty, contemporary reality…

Substance use is a recurring element related to coping mechanisms and the social environment of the characters. Tiger is prescribed Ativan to manage severe panic attacks following her mother's death, and the narrative tracks her reliance on this medication. Underage drinking is present, notably at a party where Tiger observes other teens using alcohol to escape their problems. There are mentions of characters smoking cigarettes or marijuana in passing, and one foster sibling's past is linked to parental drug…

This is a heavy exploration of traumatic grief and the systemic failures of the foster care system. The central theme revolves around 'the dark,' a metaphor for the pervasive and inescapable nature of loss that Tiger must learn to live alongside. The book deals with sudden death, the search for identity through an unknown father, and the feeling of total abandonment. Mental health struggles, including depression, panic disorders, and suicidal ideation, are treated with stark honesty. Ultimately, the story focuses…